The Fork
Or how lasting impressions are made
Last night, I was at a fast food restaurant. They gave me a fork to go with my French fries. Normally, this incident would never be remembered except that a fork decided to make it memorable. In Toy Story 4, a spork was scripted in as a character. My plastic fork would have been scripted in as the movie villain.
First, its prongs started to get bent when I stabbed the fork into the fries. To be fair the fries were crispy and firm. The fries were however pretty much normal in every other way. I bent the prongs back into shape and speared the next fry. The prongs started to bend up to 90 degrees to flip me off.
Normally, I would start using my fingers but the fork offered me a challenge. So I bent the prongs back to the closest approximation of normal. Then I angle the fork so that it was perpendicular to the fry and jab the fork in. The prongs promptly twisted out of the way to avoid work. It also manoeuvred the fry so that the other prongs could not stab it. Classic villainous behaviour to get enemies united against the protagonist.
To the manufacturers of this piece of junk, I sincerely hope that there is an afterlife where you get to use your own creation to feed yourself. To the fast food restaurant who gave me that useless fork with sauce packets that could not be open with bare hands, the solution to single use items is not to make them totally unusable.
With hindsight, I think I now have a solution. I just needed to break off the two middle prongs that were doing all the dodging. Or go to MacDonald's instead.